1.25.2009


It has been a long long while since I sat here at the computer holding the intention of wanting to share a part of my life. It was so easy in the past to tell you about a new art project or a special memory made with Olivia but when it comes to the more sensitive subjects I am often at a loss. My quietness here came first because I couldn't keep up a smiling front to blog readers while in reality feeling scared and unwell. And I discovered that the more unwell I began to feel the more I retreated, like an injured animal going deeper into her cave.
Then a few days ago I started thinking about the blog again. I was missing the connections made here. When sweet Relyn linked to a post of mine and several more kind folks left comments I knew it was time to come out of my hiding.
OK. Well. Here it is...
I am on a journey of healing like I have never been on before. (deep breath) A journey that was shown to me the day a biopsy revealed an aggressive breast cancer. But no worries, I tell everyone. After much research and prayer, I have chosen what I believe in my heart to be the best path for me and that is one that does not include conventional medicine but one of building a super-strong immune system. A macrobiotic diet, energy medicine, many herbs, juicing, acupuncture, chiropractic, meditation, yoga, therapeutic grade essentials oils. Quantum healing. (Have you ever seen the movies You Can Heal Your Life or What the Bleep Do We Know)All kinds of good things in my arsenal. And I have come now to a place where I am feeling like a warrior and thankful for this new direction my life is taking me, for the lessons learned, for the strength I am finding in myself. A good friend described the healing of this cancer as only a chapter in the book of my life. I liked that. A short chapter though hopefully, as sometimes the news will still hit me fresh all over again and I will have to work pretty hard to get to a positive place, to my peaceful warrior place. Most days though I feel strong and sure and filled with love and for that I am grateful.
For so long I have preached to others about the healing power of art and finally I am creating again. Shew. I was beginning to worry that the numbness and rejection of my art supplies was permanent. For weeks there was nothing, now thankfully a few words, however stumbling, are finding me, my tongue, my heart is loosening. Finally I can add art to the list of good things I am doing to lead me back to wellness.
Sooooo, now that my news is out I think I can go back to being just me, not me hiding cancer so no one will feel sorry for me, or me without a voice. Just me who likes the feeling of being a part of this special communnity of sweet, intelligent, artsy women.
My time at the computer is brief these days so please forgive me if I am slow to be in contact. I promise to be in touch soon.
Blessings,

38 comments:

Sharon said...

It is so nice to hear from you. And I am happy for you that you can add art to your list of good things. I am a firm believer that art and creating has healing powers. I've wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed your art in the Art Journaling by Somerset mag.
It was beautiful.

mystele said...

so very glad to know how i can be praying and that you are choosing the path of a warrior! art is an amazing weapon.

Susan said...

Tricia, so glad to see you are strong enough and able to blog about this chapter of your life. You know I'm here if you need me. I am keeping you in my prayers. Take care, Susan

Stace said...

I was thinking about you just yesterday, and wondering about your wellness. Good thoughts, strength and beauty are being wished for you.

Lisa said...

There's a lot of wisdom in What the Bleep, the Secret and You Can Heal Your Life! I'm glad art is coming back to you. It can be so difficult when we just don't "feel" like doing that one thing we know will bring so much healing.

bridgette said...

Dearest Tricia, I was just about to write you an email with this short message: thinking of you, hope you are well. xo

sounds like you are in a much better place than a few months ago. I am glad. big hugs, bri

PJ said...

what an inspiration. I think you have captured what life is about..and you have grabbed hold of it. your so strong.

Regina said...

I have missed your posts and I'm very glad you are back.
I know that art making has become a vital part of my well-being as it helps boost the positive energy for me. God bless you.

R2artstudio said...

Have missed seeing your artwork and glad to see you will be creating again. My prayers and healing thoughts are with you during this time.

smith kaich jones said...

I am new here, and learning lessons from you. I too will be sending you thoughts & prayers - I have added you to my blogroll & your name will be a reminder to me to do so, lest in my busy-ness I forget. And of course, I will be back!

:) Debi

Jo Wholohan said...

its so lovely to hear from you Tricia, ive thought of you often in your absence, thinking of you xx

Relyn said...

Tricia,

How can I tell you how glad I am that you are back? How can I tell you how humbling it is that you trust us, your blog readers, with the truth about this scary chapter in your life?

There are never really adequate words to express deep feeling. I hope that you can know... just know... what I mean. I wish you well. I wish you peace. I wish you strength. More than wish. I pray each of those things for you. If I could tell you my belief in the power of prayer, you would know just what a gift it is that I offer. I will give you my prayers. You and Oliva, your whole family. Prayers. Prayers for healing, for peace, for strength, for wisdom. And much love, dear one. ~ Relyn

Melanie said...

I just found your blog by way of Somerset Studio. (I am addicted to quotes, too).

I wish you the very best of luck in beating the cancer.

Christina said...

I am new here. Found my way over from Relyn's. I send you prayers and many blessings.

I learned so much from this post of yours.

; )

Sue Simpson said...

I have missed you. Many thoughts and prayers have been headed your way and will continue to do so.
Sending much love, smiles and some tea.

Sue

caren said...

I too am new to your blog - thanks to Relyn. I will keep you in my thought and prayers. You are on my heart!

misty said...

you have been missed very much and thought of so often.
xoxooxoxo

paris parfait said...

Thanks for sharing your brave story. My mother had breast cancer two years ago and is now fully-recovered. I wish the same for you. Take care of YOU and don't worry about the rest! I'm glad art is helping, as you fight this battle. Yes, you are a warrior and a strong one at that! My thoughts and prayers are with you. xo

carla said...

Dear Tricia - I've been stopping by your blog from time to time and not seeing you here - thinking you were perhaps writing your book or more wonderful articles for publication - so I am so sorry to read why you've been away. Yet your positive energy and warrior mode makes me believe you will come through this with your health and strength even better than before. I send you my prayers and my warmest hopes for this short chapter to pass quickly. xox - Carla

susanna said...

I just found you through Relyn's blog. I admire your courage and your positive attitude. And your artwork is beautiful and seem to have a deep, spiritual meaning.

Leah said...

sending loads of love and healing vibes your way, tricia!!

Garden Painter Art said...

Tricia:

As awful as this news is, it's wonderful and awe inspiring to hear the strength and power that is within you. That is what will beat this.

I am so glad you're back. I have been out of the blogging world myself for some time, due to depression and financial reasons. Obviously, those are nothing compared to what you are fighting. I don't comment much, but I do follow your blog.

Be well and go forward:
Kim
Garden Painter Art

vintage moon studio said...

Dearest girl... thank you for sharing your burden with us all. Think of all of the prayers that can now be raised! When you have a moment, it may be of a little bit of comfort to you to read the post I did a while back about my Mom, who faced a similar journey.

http://vintagemoonstudio.typepad.com/vintage_moon_studio/2007/12/gift-of-life.html

Know that I am thinking of you and keep you in my heart.
xox Deb

Tracy said...

Art can be a wonderful form of therapy & healing in itself. May you continue to create art and grow stronger and healthier, too! I find your courage inspiring! {hugs}}

Bobbi Lewin said...

I'm happy to see you've returned to your blog. I send all positive, healing energies your way.

Jeanne said...

We've missed you - and are glad to have you back! Your posts and artwork are so thoughtful and inspiring. I know how difficult it must have been for you to open up and share what's been going on, but remember we are all here for you and the more people there sending positive thoughts and energy your way will only help in your healing process. Take care and be well.
xo
jeanne

Deryn Mentock said...

Tricia, I'm so glad you're on the road to healing. Have you heard of a book called "The Survivor's Club"? I just heard about it and want a copy for myself. We could all stand to learn a little about surviving! I'll keep you in my prayers. Be strong and be well...

spread your wings said...

I am new here - came via Relyn. I just want to say you will be in my prayers - that you will grown healthier and stronger every day.
I absolutely love your work and will look forward to seeing more of what you create.

Debbi Baker said...

Hi Tricia - I'm catching up on my blog reading and so am very late reading this post. My thoughts are with you and I am sending hugs across the waves. I just read Quantum Healing over the Christmas break and wow it was powerful - all the best (and I love that Rumi quote and all thatr it embodies) Debbi

debra cooper said...

I'm glad you decided to come back out and share your journey. I don't doubt that the days you are strong will bring hope to someone else out there struggling and I mostly hope that you find strength here when you need it. You are in my thoughts & prayers. I'm looking forward to good news in the days and months ahead. xo,debra

The Decorated House, Donna Courtney said...

As I'm checking "old" bookmarks, I happened upon yours. Thank you for the chance to offer prayers and light of thought for you. May you be filled with Healing Light.
Donna

Julz said...

Hello! Although we don't know each other, I really enjoy reading your blog (which was shared with me by a friend).
It's been a little while since I was on so I am just catching up with all my favorites. I am saddened to hear your news and pray that you are doing well. I wanted you to know that I am a 1 year breast cancer survivor and understand what you are going through. I was told Feb. 29th of last year (yes, leap year!), that I had breast cancer and began the most terrifying fight of my life. I have kept a positive outlook and of course had a lot of faith. I am now cancer free and a stronger person than what I was over a year ago.
My prayers and thoughts are with you! Stay strong in faith and in health...you'll beat it!
Much love - Jules

Miss Sandy said...

My prayers are with you as you begin this new chapter of your life. Blessings on your path to healing.

MizCarla said...

Mwah!! I'm glad you shared with all of us--we can help pray you through it sweetness.

CANCER BE GONE!!

xoxs

Anonymous said...

found my way to you through a friend, but was taken with your desires and strength.....I love art as well, and often struggle with how to use my talents - also would love to homeschool, but terrified (I am a teacher by trade - isn't that crazy)....have 4 children myself and seem to be in a spot of not knowing exactly what to do in life....you are an inspiration - keep fighting and letting us know where you are at- believe it or not you are making a difference in others.....

SharDon Exclusives said...

I have been one of those "silent" followers but wanted to tell you that you are in our prayers and thoughts. Emerse yourself in your art projects & while creating from the heart you will feel the healing powers of Gods' love toward you...God bless you dear girl...sharon

megg said...

Hi -

I am coming at this late, but sharing my positive thoughts and prayers for you. Have you watched/ read Crazy Sexy Cancer by Kris Carr???? The documentary is SO inspiring and everyone I know who read the book was really inspired.

Please take care - good care!

xo

Shona Cole said...

I am so sorry to hear about your illness. I hope and pray that everything you try will work/is working 100%.

Shona

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